Thursday 10 June 2010

My loneliness

Then nothing.
Now I'm not sure what I'm to do.

I drew for hours on end,
cast bold colours in reckless strikes.
Formed shapeless anger,
I formed words to paper.
One word read;
why?

I moved on to my music.
The chords formed
and minors rung true.
I ended up singing one song over
and over,
to no relief.
Loneliness still stalked me.

I took my poison
and hoped for the best.
But the worst came true,
my mind wouldn't shake this thing.

I tried to walk it off,
I trod in the amber light of night.
My music swimming around my head,
it swam in the wrong direction.
Seems I can't shake this notion.

Desperate.
I ran.
Jumped on through,
avoiding trees and bushes,
just running to nothing,
for nothing;
nothing but to clear my mind.

A numb thud rung through,
I spun through the air.
Cast to the cold ground,
confused.
staring up,
my jaw left hurting,
"Fucking tree".

My confused mind thought of only one thing,
something I've been trying to run from.
The same thing that has been with me all along.
My loneliness.

I lay motionless,
staring to the sky,
nothing by my side.
Lost to the beauty of the day.

I only wish that I didn't have to face it alone.





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