Something that wont be

I awoke to a sun half covered by a white blanket, its light sept through, and the blue that broke through, it made peace with every callous sight that witnessed its wonder. I store on out from my warm home, through a window pane split to four by pure white plastic, the look was deemed fashionable.

I looked and wondered about you and thought, is she at work at the moment or Is she at home? Should I call around tonight or should I leave my thoughts to an assuming mind? I look and think too often, I never act on impulse. So an eve passes and I'm back home, looking out from my window.

I looked on out down, towards your house, past the green fence and towards the conservatory windows. They were lit bold by cream covered blinds, French by design. I store right on through and wondered, thought about who lay behind them. Your mother and father watching something on TV, you sat faraway, cast in the dim blue of your computer screen, playing some game, just doing anything to take your mind away from the trivialities of the real world. Wondering about him, perhaps stealing an odd thought about me? Maybe I'm not in your mind at all, maybe it's just you escaping from everything through a false reality.

But how I do remember how you were.I heard your dry wit and strength, how you hid behind it. Your mind opened and I caught a glimpse; underneath you are as fragile as every girl that I've met. Beneath all of that intelligence and layers of obvious individuality, you were just a girl lost by life. so I wonder almost every day about you. But I walk by and keep on walking, wondering about you.

-Joey

The big comedown

It was strange to note how everything change.

One phrase from you lips was all it took.

Such words torn jagged through,

Such guilt and foolishness filled me.

Afterwards,

deafening silence,

a muddle of logical mess,

my saddest happiness I hid behind.

Just to be kind.

Lowly sighs,

music, alcohol

and the words that were said

spinning around me,

taunting my head,

stealing all the happiness I held.

Desperately drowning in the sound,

horrible alcohol,

a bottle of cheap spirits.

I took the bottle

and drunk from its neck.

It's poison was met smiling

by a welcoming cringe.

Words replaced by a World spinning,

thoughts weren't certain.

Flat on my back,

fingers felt nothing,

my legs felt nothing,

I was only in my mind.

The bottle rolled across bare grounds,

empty.

A stray welling lingers by my eye,

those words weren't quenched by my intoxication.

They stained every thought in surreal insanity instead.

Howling silently, ringing violently

pain slicing and twisting through me.

The torn crimson and pitched black were all I could see.

-Joey

Such a day

How surreal it seemed to hear such a laugh passing from her lips, amazing was such a day. I Never knew someone could be so funny, no girl has ever made me laugh like that; I didn't think it was possible. But our laughs kept on coming boldly and then quietly as I remembered the hour was late (my folks were sleeping in the next room).

I begun to wish that I was right there with her. How much funnier would it have been to see her crumble to the ground in hysterics? And to watch me trip as I try to pick her up? What a sight it would have been to see two laughing fools rolling about the floor. Such a day will come I'm sure.

I wouldn't of traded this night for another, to me it was one of those nights that I'll never forget. For a day that started off so poorly I couldn't have expected it to have shone so brightly by the end. It was her birthday.

We talked for hours, it seemed little more than minutes to me, I wish I had the day. I don't think that I could run out of things to say and laugh about with her, I'm not sure I can, ever. So bring on the evening and night so I can spend it right, bring it on so I can talk with her tonight.

-Joey

Tainted Sun

Come the day with such emptiness.

Rise a morning sun struck down

and muted.

Stamped in place his grey soul;

you wallow in their callous smiles.

The Isolated sun is surrounded by a storm.

There lies a shipwreck rotting,

relentlessly rocking and forced;

Battered and broken.

Direction-less,

his feeble warmth is lost.

Lashings of stinging ice jab into sides,

breaking through,

Spew

and flow crimson wine into the seas claws.

Bled dry of all value and meaning,

left to the mercy of the deepest ocean.

You fell through to nothing.

Your warmth forgotten,

replaced by black,

a husk so rotten,

so twisted,

that your beauty can never come back.

Through the dark,

watch as cackling waves pass over-head.

Stare on up and will the sun back.

Come through the drabbest clouds,

pierce through the waves

and strike the sky clear of

every laugh.

Break through a stunned storm,

silence its mayhem

and leave your mark.

So the storm may never return,

ruin every shrieking cloud,

evaporate every gaunt look to nothing.

Gone,

all but the morning sun,

left to shine.

the storm broken like his fear.

He had lost something that day,

but he was left to shine,

stained in crimson forever.

-Joey

A typical day

I woke up to the glory of a grey sky,

I read the table-side clock as my eye

stumbled on by.

Their focus swept in and out,

my weighty arms carried sticky palms

and my fingers grasped and flailed about.

I pulled the clock to see the time clearer,

surely my mind plays tricks.

I pulled my eyes nearer.

"Oh shit"

There was somewhere that I was supposed to be.

Or was there?

My mind is still so numb.

I rushed about,

my frantic brain raced,

I reached for the door,

doubts burst and flew on through.

Shower,

shave,

shoes and

there's something missing?

The keys weren't in my jacket,

they couldn't be found in baggy jeans

nor the table side draws.

I looked about the chairs and floors,

Ahh!

The table by the front door.

I stole the keys from their slumber,

they chimed as they flung.

I placed them to the lock and stopped.

I froze mid motion.

My doubting mind had realised;

"I didn't have anywhere to be this day."

-Joey